Do Not Hold Back

“Where have you been?”

“I haven’t heard from you in ages?”

 My year has been filled with this. It’s been a ‘quiet’ year. Many times, it felt like I was stumbling under the weight of the things I had to do, to build. I shouldn’t have been caught unawares—and maybe I wasn’t, really—but I just hadn’t outlined the process or given much thought to the demands, so when I did, I went quiet.

“Enlarge the place of your tent,
    stretch your tent curtains wide,
    do not hold back;
lengthen your cords,
    strengthen your stakes.”

- Isaiah 54:2

Often, when God is saying something, I don’t understand the implication till it starts happening, and then I get into moments when all I can say is, “There’s so much happening.” When He said that in 2016, I embraced it even though I didn’t understand it. When, at the end of 2017, He started to give me things and show me all the things I needed to do with the things He had put in my hands, I began to understand. To realise that I needed to put aside my plans and embrace His.

I needed to be still.

I said to a friend that when I ask God for stuff, He just gives me work to do. It’s been a time of being stretched. Of being pruned. Of growth. Unlearning and relearning. Choosing the way in which I want to walk. Realising that there’s really only one way that brings peace—His. Listening and going in the way He says to walk. There’s so much I’ve wanted to write but haven’t had the time or mind-space to. It’s been a work-filled year, and I’m looking forward to taking a break soon.

I wanted to say, “Hello, I’m still here.”